3 funny Wierd Al Yankovic videos

You can not talk about funny videos till you see some of Wierd Al Yankovic. The first one is my favourite. A cover of Chamillionaire - White and Nerdy:





The second one is called "FAT", a cover after Michael Jackson's "Bad"





The third one is classic, "Amish Paradise" cover after Coolio's "Gangsta's Paradise"

Pool trick shot

This is the most incredible pool shot lately with dominoes. Enjoy

Matrix Ping Pong

Here is one funny video I am sure you will all enjoy. See what happens when superheroes play ping pong!

Britney Spears Jokes

Britney Spears' husband, Kevin Federline, has his own rap album now. He works under the rap name, La-Z.

Q: What Do Britney Spears and Barbie have in common?
A: They're both blonde, plastic and brainless!

Q: What did Britney's right leg say to her left leg?
A: Nothing, they've never been together!!

Britney Spears is in trouble because she was photographed driving with her baby sitting on her lap instead of strapped into a car seat.
Child welfare experts say this is still better for the baby than leaving it at home with Kevin Federline.

Britney Spears decides to go out with her two new buddies, Shaggy and Craig David. They decide to go to the mall and thus enter the elevator to descend. Suddenly, one of them farts. Shaggy: 'It Wasn't Me' Craig: 'I'm Walking Away' Britney: 'Oops, I Did It Again!' Embarrassed by this predicament, Britney decides to make up for it by taking them out again. They catch a train and leave the station when, believe it or not, someone farts again. Shaggy: 'It Wasn't Me' Craig: 'I'm Walking Away' Britney: 'Stronger, Than Yesterday!'

More Blonde Jokes

Blonde Joke 1

A blonde was walking her dogs when a man walking in the opposite direction says "oh my, you have such beautiful dogs.. what are their names?"
The blonde replies "Well, the taller one is Timex and the shorter one is Rolex."
The man responds "Huh.. that's interesting.. why did you name them such names?"
The blonde sighs and shakes her head "Everyone keeps asking me the same thing... duhh, what else can you name your watch dogs??"

Blonde Joke 2

A blond gets a new cell phone from her husband.
The next day she goes to Wal-mart and her phone rings, so she answers it.
It was her husband. He says, "How's the new cell phone?"
She replied, "Great...but how did you know I was at Wal-mart?"

Blonde Joke 3

A blonde stormed up to the front desk of the library and said, "I have a complaint!"
"Yes, Ma'am?" said the librarian looking up at her.
"I borrowed a book last week and it was horrible!"
Puzzled by her complain the librarian asked "What was wrong with it?"
"It had way too many characters and there was no plot whatsoever!" said the blonde.
The librarian nodded and said, "Ahhh. So you must be the person who took our phone book."

The Evolution of Dance

There is one short clip that is quite funny and that is known around the world. Just in case you didn't see it yet take a look. The Evolution of Dance




Also here is an interview with the Evolution of Dance creator:

Blondes Q&A Jokes

Q: How do blonde braincells die?
A: Alone.

Q: How do you brainwash a blonde?
A: Give her a douche and shake her upside down.

Q: How do you change a blonde's mind?
A: Blow in her ear.

Q: How do you measure a blonde's intelligence?
A: Stick a tire pressure gauge in her ear!

Q: How does a blonde kill a fish?
A: She drowns it.

Q: A blonde going to London on a plane, how can you steal her window seat?
A: Tell her the seats that are going to London are all in the middle row.

Q: How do you amuse a blonde for hours?
A: Write 'Please turn over' on both sides of a piece of paper

Chuck Norris Jokes

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris recently had the idea to sell his urine as a canned beverage. We know this beverage as Red Bull.

On the 7th day, God rested.... Chuck Norris took over.

Chuck Norris owns the greatest poker face of all-time. It helped him win the 1983 world series of poker despite him holding just a joker, a 2 of clubs, a 7 of spades, and a green number 4 from Uno and a monopoly 'get out of jail free' card.

Chuck Norris is Luke Skywalker's real father.

Wrestling Main Event

Our story begins at the Olympics, specifically the wrestling event. It is narrowed down to the Russian or the American for the gold medal.Before the final match, the American wrestler's trainer came to him and said,
"Now don't forget all the research we've done on this Russian. He's never lost a match because of this "pretzel" hold he has. Whatever you do, don't let him get you in this hold! If he does, you're finished!"
The wrestler nodded in agreement. Now, to the match: The American and the Russian circled each other several times looking for an opening. All of a sudden the Russian lunged forward, grabbing the American and wrapping him up in the dreaded pretzel hold! A sigh of disappointment went up from the crowd, and the trainer buried his face in his hands for he knew all was lost. He couldn't watch the ending. Suddenly there was a scream, a cheer from the crowd, and the trainer raised his eye just in time to see the Russian flying up in the air. The Russian's back hit the mat with a thud, and the American weakly collapsed on top of him, getting the pin and winning the match.The trainer was astounded! When he finally got the American wrestler alone, he asks,
"How did you ever get out of that hold? No one has ever done it before!"
The wrestler answered,
"Well, I was ready to give up when he got me in that hold, but at the last moment, I opened my eyes and saw this pair of balls right in front of my face. I thought I had nothing to lose, so with my last ounce of strength I stretched out my neck and bit those babies just as hard as I could.
"So!" the trainer exclaimed, "that finished him off did it?"
"No, but you'd be amazed how strong you get when you bite your own balls!"

Lawyer Jokes

Here are some funny lawyer jokes. I always enjoyed them :)

Lawyer Joke 1

The scene is the darkest jungle in Africa. Two tigers are stalking through the jungle when the one in the rear suddenly reaches out with his tongue and licks the butt of the one in front. The lead tiger turns and says, "Hey, cut it out, alright." The other tiger says sorry and they continue on their way.

After about five minutes the rear tiger suddenly repeats his action. The front tiger turns angrily and says," I said don't do that again!" The rear tiger says "sorry" again and they continue.

After about another five minutes, the rear tiger repeats his action. The front tiger turns and says, "What is it with you, anyway? I said to stop." The rear tiger says, "I really am sorry but I just ate a lawyer and I'm just trying to get the taste out of my mouth."

Lawyer Joke 2

A pick pocket was up in court for a series of petty crimes. The judge said "Mr. Banks you are hereby fined $100." The lawyer stood up and said "Thanks, my lord, however my client only has $75 on him at this time, but if you'd allow him a few minutes in the crowd. . ."

Lawyer Joke 3

Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day. "My name is Billy. What's yours?" asked the first boy. "Tommy," replied the second. "My Daddy's an accountant. What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy. Tommy replied, "My Daddy's a lawyer." "Honest?" asked Billy. "No, just the regular kind", replied Tommy.

Some Michael Jackson Jokes

Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose?
A. From a catalogue.

Q. Why did Michael Jackson place a phone call to Boyz-2-Men?
A. He thought it was a delivery service.

Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and a plastic bag?
A. One is white, plastic and dangerous to young children, the other is a plastic bag.

Q. What does Wal-Mart, Zellers and Michael Jackson have in common?
A. Boy's underwear half off.

Q. What's the difference between Michael Jackson and greyhound racing?
A. The greyhounds wait for the hairs to come out.

Q. What's the difference between Michael and Connie Chung?
A. Michael's been able to have kids.

2 Blonde Jokes

I don't have anything with blondes and I do not believe about this racial blonde women are stupid stuff but I just had to write these two down:

Blonde Joke 1:

"There was a blonde driving down the road one day. She glanced to her right and noticed another blonde sitting in a nearby field, rowing a boat with no water in sight.

The blonde angrily pulled her car over and yelled at the rowing blonde, “What do you think you're doing? It's things like this that give us blondes a bad name. If I could swim, I'd come out there and kick your butt!”

Blonde Joke 2:

" A blonde is like a pooltable, put a dollar in and she'll rack your balls."

Kiss my Wife

What’s this daily charge for ‘fruit’? The hotel guess asked the manager.
“We didn’t eat any.”
“But the fruit was place in your room every day. It isn’t our fault you didn’t take advantage of it.” “I see,” said the man as he subtracted $150.00 from the bill
“What are you doing”? Sputtered the manager.
“I’m subtracting 50 dollars a day for your kissing my wife.”
“What? I didn’t kiss your wife.”
“Ah,” replied the man, “but she was there.”

Real Advertisments from Newspapers - Really Funny

Here they are! Just picture it! They were found in real newspaper ads:

-A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine food expertly served by waitresses in appetizing forms.
-Dinner Special -- Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00.
-For sale: an antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large drawers.
-Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory.
-Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.
-We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by hand.
-Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.
-Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it.
-Mt. Kilimanjaro, the breathtaking backdrop for the Serena Lodge. Swim in the lovely pool while you drink it all in.
-The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds, and other athletic facilities.
-Man, honest. Will take anything.
-Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200 a month. References required.
-Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel.
-UsedCars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!
-Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential.
-Our experienced Mom will care of your child. Fenced yard, meals, and smacks included.
-Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.
-Illiterate? Write today for free help.
-Auto Repair Service. Free pick-up and delivery. Try us once, you'll never go anywhere again.

Watch out how much time you spend with the computer!

You know it’s time to re-evaluate your relationship with your computer when….

- You wake up at 3 o’clock in the morning to go to the bathroom and you stop to check your e-mail on the way back to bed.
- You move into a new house and you decide to Netscape before you landscape.
- Your family always knows where you are.